*Please play the video and proceed to read*
They say that the ability to forget is the greatest blessing in disguise from God. Shit happens, you brush it aside. It keeps coming back to you and you try your best to ward it off. You struggle with it, you try to shield yourself from it, you try to run away. Each time, it only gets stronger.
Then there comes a point where you've exhausted your resolve. A point where you've reached your carrying capacity and can't handle more. A point where it is easier to just give up and say 'I quit.'
THAT is when it'll leave you. It'll fade into some recess of your mind and leave you to face the emptiness within. It'll create a void that is so intense, it'll shatter you. Though on the brighter side, the memory won't come back to haunt you. Those beautiful will memories walk away, and leave behind some nasty scars.
I still recall so vividly how we had sworn to be the best of chums till the sun cooled down. Today, the sun shines on hotter than ever, over a friendship gone cold. There were promises of sticking together through thick and thin. We managed the thin, the thick got the better of us.
There hasn't been a conclusive ending to the friendship, not yet. We've laughed through the 'log phase,' smiled through the 'lag phase,' preparing now for the declining phase. It'll come, eventually. It doesn't need to be put into words, it needs no lengthy conversations. It is only a wedge that'll pierce deeper and deeper and finally split us into two separate entities. It'll happen so gradually that no one will notice. It will only feel like a needle pricking the heart, only a few seconds at a time, until the infarction sets in.
You'd been by my side when no one else was. You were there when I didn't notch up good grades. While I felt like running away from the rest of the world, I wanted to walk straight to you. When I stayed up all night, you made sure I never did it alone. Even if it was just a text message, you'd give me the confidence to put aside everything and fall asleep. The sun HAD to rise the next morning, right? You were happy, I was happy. You cried, I did. I've never felt a greater association with anybody else before. Both of us know a bond has been made, sealed. It is another matter though, that we longer acknowledge it. We choose to ignore it like it never happened.
I recall measuring my life in terms of 'your birthday,' 'your niece's birthday,' 'your sister's birthday,' 'your parents' anniversary...' EVERYTHING was prefixed with 'your.' It was only a year back, that the 'you' preceded the 'me' in my life. The 'you' isn't here anymore, it took the 'me' along with it.
My bestie, my secret-keeper, my 4am friend, my LOL friend...you filled in every spot! Though on the downside- I do not think I can ever find a replacement.
The present scenario boils down to me being grateful for the wonderful time together. My mother- always the biggest, unflinching support in my life- taught me to absorb all that is good and to leave out the dregs without much botheration. This advice today, gives me the motivation to go on. Things aren't like what they were before, but that does not mean they can't be better. I know you aren't here, but the memories you've left will outlive you. I will smile as I recall them, not cry. I will be glad it happened, not crib because it's over.
And for all I know, you will still be only a text message away. One day, you will muster the courage and say 'jaande jaande. Bol nadal, watsup?'
I'll fight. I'll ask questions, I'll make a scene. Only because I love it when you defend our friendship.
That day will come, a friendship as gleaming as ours, can never be dull for long.
Until then, I have treasure trove of memories to smile at.
Whoever said the capacity to forget is a blessing?
They say that the ability to forget is the greatest blessing in disguise from God. Shit happens, you brush it aside. It keeps coming back to you and you try your best to ward it off. You struggle with it, you try to shield yourself from it, you try to run away. Each time, it only gets stronger.
Then there comes a point where you've exhausted your resolve. A point where you've reached your carrying capacity and can't handle more. A point where it is easier to just give up and say 'I quit.'
THAT is when it'll leave you. It'll fade into some recess of your mind and leave you to face the emptiness within. It'll create a void that is so intense, it'll shatter you. Though on the brighter side, the memory won't come back to haunt you. Those beautiful will memories walk away, and leave behind some nasty scars.
I still recall so vividly how we had sworn to be the best of chums till the sun cooled down. Today, the sun shines on hotter than ever, over a friendship gone cold. There were promises of sticking together through thick and thin. We managed the thin, the thick got the better of us.
There hasn't been a conclusive ending to the friendship, not yet. We've laughed through the 'log phase,' smiled through the 'lag phase,' preparing now for the declining phase. It'll come, eventually. It doesn't need to be put into words, it needs no lengthy conversations. It is only a wedge that'll pierce deeper and deeper and finally split us into two separate entities. It'll happen so gradually that no one will notice. It will only feel like a needle pricking the heart, only a few seconds at a time, until the infarction sets in.
You'd been by my side when no one else was. You were there when I didn't notch up good grades. While I felt like running away from the rest of the world, I wanted to walk straight to you. When I stayed up all night, you made sure I never did it alone. Even if it was just a text message, you'd give me the confidence to put aside everything and fall asleep. The sun HAD to rise the next morning, right? You were happy, I was happy. You cried, I did. I've never felt a greater association with anybody else before. Both of us know a bond has been made, sealed. It is another matter though, that we longer acknowledge it. We choose to ignore it like it never happened.
I recall measuring my life in terms of 'your birthday,' 'your niece's birthday,' 'your sister's birthday,' 'your parents' anniversary...' EVERYTHING was prefixed with 'your.' It was only a year back, that the 'you' preceded the 'me' in my life. The 'you' isn't here anymore, it took the 'me' along with it.
My bestie, my secret-keeper, my 4am friend, my LOL friend...you filled in every spot! Though on the downside- I do not think I can ever find a replacement.
The present scenario boils down to me being grateful for the wonderful time together. My mother- always the biggest, unflinching support in my life- taught me to absorb all that is good and to leave out the dregs without much botheration. This advice today, gives me the motivation to go on. Things aren't like what they were before, but that does not mean they can't be better. I know you aren't here, but the memories you've left will outlive you. I will smile as I recall them, not cry. I will be glad it happened, not crib because it's over.
And for all I know, you will still be only a text message away. One day, you will muster the courage and say 'jaande jaande. Bol nadal, watsup?'
I'll fight. I'll ask questions, I'll make a scene. Only because I love it when you defend our friendship.
That day will come, a friendship as gleaming as ours, can never be dull for long.
Until then, I have treasure trove of memories to smile at.
Whoever said the capacity to forget is a blessing?
